-=Sianz and Disappointed=-

I join alot things make alot friends but then who are my close frenz? each and every sure to have frenz they often hang out but then i no longer sure. mine use to be my sec sch grp. after i involve alot in events they began to call mi out lesser le and i think not anymore now. they got what events, movie, celebration i not in it le.

In term of nyp, i use to hang out wif renli, joanne, may and grp but well dun think they call mi out also le. feel very de sianz. before i went to ophir, i met chuang lim, one of the close frenz i tot in sit but haha that day he and olive went to sch put voiceout poster, i dunno bout that what he say was if he ask mi, am i free? same reply as sec sch frenz, i dun like it. y like to assume. the existance of mi in others are like dimishing. i dun feel gd.

last friday if i not wrong got basketball, renli told mi bout it but then when i ask for location no reply came. call yit jing and ask but he say will sms mi if anything on. now i not too sure if there is basketball on that day not.

knowing alot ppl is gd but then none that call u again is no meaning... suddenly got this urge to quit voiceout oso. somehow, i dunno, is abit not organised. in fact, no sense of belonging. this feeling is not very gd. now i am reali feeling very low.

i oso feel that i hang out alot wif nyaa ppl, but then is basically outdoors stuff and events? i dunno...is not like i got go out wif them for movie wif them oso. they are close but not that kindda close oso. not like i can bottle out my feelings kindda frenz oso.

Sometime, i am thinking, do i reali nid msn, it dun seem too important if i am online anot. now i think onli in maple ppl will regonise my exist, so shd i forsake everything for maple? no idea.

I have alot things to say...recently alot things happen. like my family again. last time very long ago it was shu jun hu be my listening ear and follow by my grp of frenz, though i didn bottle all my things to them but i at least did some. now i cant find any to say out my feels and my unhappiness to anyone. Chu hua might be a gd candidate but then i know she is busy wif her own probs and sch stuffs as well so i dun reali wish to get more burden oso.

think enuff of this. i shall reali try once more again before i finally come up wif the last decision.

PS: thx ah gerene. for that link. if i can get 40% happy haha i think is gd enuff? lolx